 April 8, 2017-Virginia Beach, VA I sat on a business panel with five other entrepreneurs, coaches and authors. Everyone was most impressed with a 9-year-old entrepreneur who attended the conference for the second year in a row with his notebook and pen taking notes, and his very mature questions. His name is Ellis and he's looking for sponsors to support his business dream. You can learn more about him on his page. Having a mentor for various areas of your life is crucial. That's what parents are. They mentor, hopefully, and train us for adulthood. They're only given the first 20% or less of our lives to guide us in full measure, and from then on we're responsible for finding our own mentors and coaches. I'm a mentor and I have several mentors. I LOVE to connect with experts and learn from them. One of my mentors told me at the conference this past weekend, that I'm not only mentoring and coaching because of the deep heart and personal issues I address; that I'm actually counseling. What's interesting about this is that a few people have recently suggested I return to college to get a doctorate. I've always said if I ever did get a doctorate it would be in psychology. I love The Grow Your Dreams Conference. It's served as a launching pad for greater things for me each of the three years I've been honored as a speaker. I expect even greater next year. If you want to be launched into your next level, you have to go where the launching pad is. Launching pads don't come to you. I'm available, and the conference has opened early registration for 2018. Don't delay. Windows of opportunity close.    Do you have a movie-going ritual? I do. When I go to the movies, I always get a soda, popcorn and a hot dog. It doesn't matter what else I've already eaten that day or will later, I get those three things every time. Candy's optional for me, but those three items are not. Movies for two usually costs me around $50 so when I go, I'm going to see a specific movie. When I lived in Arizona, my friend Bryan and I used to go to the movies and lunch most Mondays because any showing before 1 p.m. was $5. We'd go see anything - whether we thought it would be good or not because ... who cares about $5, right? I'll tell you who cares about $5. People who've been laid off from jobs and have mortgages, private school and all those other living expenses to pay day in and day out. Homeless people care about $5. Single moms care about $5. I've been in all three of those categories, so please take this message to heart. First, as a business woman, I don't really fuss over what companies charge for their products and services because I realize they've broken the financials down to value per minute (services) and per item. Overhead has to be paid for the business to exist and it has to be profitable to continue. I get that. That's a benefit of access to multiple companies that offer similar products and services. Everyone can't afford my services, and that's ok. I service a higher-income bracket. But, my client base allows me to have fewer clients and be able to do a lot of pro bono work. The services I provide free of charge are important to me because I've been laid off, homeless and a single mom and have needed the expertise of a professional but couldn't afford it. I went to the movies last Wednesday, and when I paid I was kinda grumbling about paying $6 for popcorn, $4 for a hot dog and $5 for a soda. The grumbling stopped when I considered the alternative - sitting through a movie without the items I've conditioned myself to consume. I'm not willing to do that. Let's look at a couple of the many lessons I see here:
I'm going to continue spending $25 and up to go the movies, I'm sure, but what I want you think about is this: If you're in need of a professional mentor's expertise, but think you can't afford it, you're wrong. If you want something, you'll do what you need to do and pay what you need to pay to get it. What do you want? Do you want to break through and overcome blocks to success? Do you want to work from home so you can home school? Do you want to improve your communication skills and negotiate a raise, benefits or a promotion? I can help. Contact me today.   Focusing on today is important. It keeps us from being overwhelmed, helps us to live in the present and allows us to win. Think of all the hours we've spent (or for some, spend) contemplating things that are happening days, weeks or months from now. Or the conversations we've had when we've pretended to listen but were really previewing future events. I've committed to stop doing such. And I admit that's a challenge for me because my brain moves quickly and I'm always planning ahead. Take this very post, for example. I'm writing it well in advance during an hour of my day that's scheduled for rest. There's nothing wrong with planning, everyone should plan parts of life. But you can't and shouldn't plan everything, and note to self: when you've planned to rest, rest. Your mind and body will thank you for it. Let's take a closer look at the above reasons to focus on today:
Simple but not easy - like most things that create champions. Just keep at it. That's my plan. I'm going to practice 1 and 2 in an area at a time and let the wins stack up. Every biography of an extraordinary individual has a line that tells us they repeated a process too many times to count, and then it eventually paid off. The same can happen for you if you want it to be so. If you need help focusing on today, read the book I Say So: Speaking My Way to Success. If you need one-on-one help, an accountability partner or strategy specific to your situation, book a mentoring package or schedule a call today.    The brain is amazing. When a to-do list is created, as we're writing, the brain sends signals to relevant parts that state, "These things need to get done." This happens because you have visual and kinetic focus on the listed tasks. If you're like me, you have visual, auditory AND kinetic focus because I say the tasks aloud as I write them. The more parts of you that are involved in something, the more memory you'll have of that thing. ACTION STEPS FOR SUCCESS:
  Are Americans still concerned with being pc? It's a valid question to ask in 2017. Riots aren't pc. Peaceful protests are ... riots are not. Ever. It's not politically correct to destroy someone else's property. Nor is it pc to murder or to admit you have murderous tendencies - in most cases, that is. From my observations, I've discerned we're only politically correct until the moment we feel we can't get what we want. Then ... all bets are off. I've never been a fan of pc nonsense and I seriously doubt I'd ever be accused of trying to be politically correct. I subscribe to a policy of honor, integrity and speaking the truth in love. My messages aren't always popular because the truth sometimes hurts. But on the flip side, it also sets us free. Therein lies the reality of political correctness - when the truth hurts so badly that we don't want to receive it, be pc instead or risk public shunning. We are a society of ever-decreasing morals which is the truth. But because that truth is uncomfortable, anyone who states that openly is called intolerant and worse. Political correctness is a lie. It's a facade. It's manipulation. Sugarcoating and denying the truth for popularity or bribery to gain something always leaves one party in a deficit. I say if what we're doing and speaking isn't improving and adding to the lives that'll be affected, we have a responsibility to choose differently. I desire for the people I mentor and impact to be free to live their authentic selves and truly be who they are in every situation. I want them to be confident enough to speak their hearts without fear of rejection or retaliation. I'm working on that one client at a time. I say political correctness is trash and I'm throwing it out with a bunch of other junk this year. Care to join me?   Do you have social media friends that you follow simply because you love the foolishness they post? I have one who's particularly entertaining. She posts the craziest commentary and I often read the posts, and whincing, say, "That's why she's still single." Here are three no-no's that frequent her commentary that repel men of quality from her life:
If you think you may be repelling the quality of man you want in your life because of your words, I can help. I've turned things around for myself and for many other women as well. Book a Communication Superstar Session or schedule a call so you can attract what you truly desire in a man. It's 2017 ... time to do what's necessary to get the relationship you want.   I've shared before that I used to think I knew everything and didn't like to ask for help. Crisis changed that for me. I don't want you to have to wait until you're life has totally fallen apart before you seek the wisdom of someone more experienced than yourself. I want you get help now, while things may be difficult, but you haven't lost hope because of the darkness around you. I know what it's like to feel hopeless because you can't see a way out. I know what it's like to want to die because that seems easier than trying to fix everything that's gone wrong. I also know that anything can be overcome because I've experienced it. My testimony of overcoming the most-difficult of circumstances is what makes me an effective mentor. If you're in a crisis situation, that's my specialty and I can help.  |
Zari Banks, M.EdAuthor, Teacher, Mentor and Speaker 
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